Amanda. 20 years old. Owner of 2 spoiled dogs. Lives in western NY. Madly in love with her fiance Randy. Studied 2 years at college for informatics and will continue sometime in the near future. Opinionated, sensitive, emotional, loyal, dedicated. A whole slew of things
I’m currently abandoning my site it seems. I’m still blogging over at the sub domain (PPP purposes) and therefore I forget to come over here and blog. It’s been 3 days but a nice rhythm, every 2-3 days I blog and well, 90 days I’ll have more than the 30 required entries. Should be a good time indeed.
Did I mention I might be going on a cruise during my spring break? Nothing is solid yet but our plans are in the working for me, sophia, and Carolyn (coworkers) to go on a 7 day cruise to the virgin isles, Dominican republic, and somewhere else that appears to have slipped my mind. It’d be around $700 which is pricey but it’d totally be worth it to have 7 days of luxury (everything is included) and well, yeah. I really hope this works out and doesn’t fall through, I want to do something for spring break. If Mike gets a job maybe him and I can plan something to do during the time period. We could always rent something near the beach or go to TN where I’ve wanted to go back for eons. I have my doubts though.
Mike well, I’m just not even sure anymore. All I seem to do is get frustrated with him and everything he does. He can’t have a normal adult conversation without getting defensive or being a sarcastic asshole. God forbid I bring up the idea of a job, because we all know he’s been sitting endlessly on his ass since the end of September while I work my tail off. I’ve told him multiple times I don’t want this, I don’t want him but he refuses to go saying he still loves me. Love doesn’t win always, you need other things and I’ve lost all my attraction to him. I see him and he disgusts me, his laziness and unwillingness to get a decent job. His “I’m not flipping burgers” attitude which he has no right to have because he’s not better than anyone else, he doesn’t have the education to get anything better. His “I’m not going to college because I’m not ready and don’t want to” makes me think of a child. Even worse is the “Where are you going to look for a job?” and getting an I don’t know or “Why do i need a full time job, what bills do I have?” I don’t want that in life, I want someone who strives for more. Someone who wants to make something of themselves and be somebody, not a nobody. A loser, it’s what he is right now and it’s where he’s going to stay if he doesn’t do something. I’ve tried but I can’t push any longer. I’m not going to pull teeth to get something accomplished. I’m better off alone right now, so I can focus on what is important to me right now, success.
I brought the cruise topic up and he made me have this whole guilty trip on how I’d be leaving him for a week and he’d miss me, he’d be jealous, I was supposed to see the ocean for the first time with him. 1. He’d ruin it, he’s so negative and sarcastic all the time. He can’t just enjoy something without smart ass remarks. He thinks they’re funny, I think they’re extremely immature. 2. Girls only. 3. I’m not forking over $700 of my hard earned money to support him.
He also thinks we’re getting the nintendo wii. I intend to, but he seems to think that we’re going to get it in January when I get my student aid. No dice. I’m not spending my money to buy a wii, only to see him sit for hours on end playing it while I continue to work and go to school. We’re not getting one until he has a job and proves he can hold it. He could also pay for the majority of it himself, I’m not supporting his gaming habits if he won’t help himself. If you can’t tell, there’s a serious lack of love here. I really feel that things are/ought to be over between us. I just can’t see myself spending the rest of my life with someone like that, I just can’t do it. I need someone who can step up and be a man, not just a boy. I don’t need a kid right now and that’s exactly what he acts like. I need out of this, really. It’s hard though when he refuses to leave.
November 21st, 2006 at 9:55 am
I dunno what I’d do if the person I was trying to break up with wouldn’t leave. My advice - if you really don’t wanna be with him, don’t bring him along when you move home.
November 21st, 2006 at 10:30 am
As much as I’m normally for sticking it out (my parents were on the verge of divorce a few times but stuck it out and now they’re happier than ever) it sounds like the whole thing is just festering.
You’re not his mom. You’re not his caretaker (obviously, caretakers get paid!). You’re not his slave or his “wifey.” You’re his girlfriend, his fiancée even. You don’t need this kind of crap from him.
I’d give him a deadline. Shape up by Spring Break or forget it. Or maybe even sooner. Shape up by Groundhog Day or forget it.
And go on the cruise, and don’t apologize. See the ocean. You’ll love it.
November 22nd, 2006 at 7:41 pm
I hope you do not get offended by this comment, but it’s only my opinion ..
I don’t agree that a girl should be out working and paying the bills for man. The man should at least make an effort to do something, and vice versa. If Mike has been sitting on his ass since September, I’d be prone to say “Get a job or get out”. I said that to an ex whom I was deeply in love with, and he broke up with me, and left. He had the same “I’m not flipping burgers” attitude, and well, that’s just too bad for him. But 6 months later and guess who’s trying to crawl back? HIM.
If you have lost all attraction to him, and have made it clear, I think it’s best you move out. Whether you go back with you’re parents or a relative, or you try and live by yourself. No one should be stuck in a relationship where they feel nothing towards their partner, and are footing the bill for almost everything.
As far as the cruise I say go - without him. Maybe if he’ll “miss you” and “be jealous” he might wake up and smell the roses and realize what he has now, and what he’s about to lose.
It’s probably none of my business, and I probably don’t know the half of it. But it seems Mike has a lot of maturing to do.
November 23rd, 2006 at 5:18 am
I work only part time while my husband is working full time. He is far more educated than me but both of us are doing ours to have the life style we wish to - but I doubt one of us would be able to do it all alone.
I so know the anti flipping burger attitude. I had a friend once who just finished university. He would rather sit at home whining about money - while he was waiting for feedback from his applications. He should have gotten himself a not so challenging yet income giving job - in my opinion.
I also say - go on that cruise! I have lived with a view to the ocean all my life - it’s windy but pretty
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