Growing up… is hard to do

I feel like I’ve crossed a new line today, I broke a barrier. I received a message from Randy’s wife on myspace telling me she needed his DNA to prove that he’s Dillion’s father. Instead of doing the petty stuff that’s usual I gave her the prison address, his DIN #, and phone number. Then I messaged her back and told her that if she wanted to talk instead of IM’ing or whatnot to call me and gave her my #. 3 minutes later the phone rang and it was her.

We managed to talk civilly like mature adults and worked out that she wants Randy to be in Dillion’s life. Says she doesn’t want child support, told her she can’t get any while he’s in anyways. Also explained that this isn’t a battle, I’m not out to get her or anything. That Randy isn’t a deadbeat like she’s making him out to be, he does want to be in his life but she needs to work with us not against us. She claims she sent pics/birth certificate to the county jail but they were returned. So in the end we determined that she and I can be mature to one another and work this out. She’s moved on from him, has a boyfriend who she’s getting a place with. Randy and I are happy with each other. I told her that he has a right to see him and we decided that Sunday when Randy calls here I have to talk to him to see if he’d be willing to have Carrie/Dillion visit when I go up. Yes, it will be awkward b/c her, him, and I all are at a table for 6 hours and him and I usually talk about love and everything. I told her this as well and she says it doesn’t matter because she’s over him completely.

I just don’t want to show up like that and have Randy flip out you know? But he does deserve to meet his son, he’ll be 6 months on March 5th. That’s a lot of lost time, it’s time to get involved. He still wants custody but until that even gets into full swing I don’t see a problem with visitation like that. Granted.. I’d have to pick her up 75 miles away, drive 240 there, sit for 6 hours with her, drive back, and all that at my expense (guess who doesn’t work?) but I feel that he is worth it. I can deal with her for about 14-16 hours in order for that visit to happen, and I will if that is what he wants. This isn’t about me, this is about his son.

On a completely unrelated note my desk is very messy because it’s scattered with my various office supplies (I love them). Paperclips, staples, stapler, pens, sharpies in 25 different colors, and of course things like lotion and my camera. I need to organize, but it’s hard because everytime I do I get something new like custom pens or something. At least office supplies aren’t expensive, there’s a positive. :)

4 Responses to “Growing up… is hard to do”

  1. Anna Says:

    You are so doing the right thing. And are INCREDIBLY giving to offer to driver her up there and all that. I’d tell her to find her own way.

    I seriously wish my ex’s S/O would realize these things and was as willing to be as easy to work with as you are. It would make things so much easier on all of us. Especially Cassidy.

  2. Kecia Says:

    It’s great that things are going well between you and his ex. That will make things a lot easier, especially while she’s in your car for almost a whole day…

  3. Jenn Says:

    I agree with Anna. You are doing a good thing. But… with the price of gas, there’s no way Carrie could help out at all? Take a bus with Dillion to meet you? Have her boyfriend bring her and Dillion to you? Driving an extra 150 miles is a LOT…

  4. Holly Says:

    That’s good that you and she are getting on ok. :) I imagine it makes things an awful lot easier for both of you. :)

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